Should i thank myspace for giving all the ugly fat ass ugly chicks a place to lie to guys about their weight and looks and food intake? should i thank adobe for creating a programs that can make the grossest chick ever look like a perfect 10?

No i shouldn’t, I should fucking sue them all on a global scale.
Its fucking sick what ive come across the last few hours.

PHOTOSHOP!!

NICE TRY! HIT AND MISS!
Look, if i want a fat chick i don’t need to go online to find one. i’m sure i could go to any local eatery and screw one in the bathroom…… While shes eating of course. Its bad enough you gotta try and find someone thats not a total whore, or a total thief, or a gold digger, or any other fucked up type of woman there is out there, but now you gotta worry about the one that has everything going for her except for the fact shes fat and ugly.

sure this may sound shallow in my part right?

Well in my defense i’m not the one lying. I’m not the one photoshoping the lies to convince someone that i’m thin and hot. I just wonder what happens when they do finally meet someone from their online escapades.

I remember a few years back when i met some chick online, anyways she was not at all what she made herself out to be. know what I did? I walked away before she could see me and blocked her from all my contact lists. Needless to say im sure she sat there waiting for my poor yuppie ass for about an hour before she probably got the hint.

i guess the moral of the post is, If your lying about what you look like or making yourself out to be something your not, then don’t be surprised when YOU, not your online alter ego meets up with someone like me, someone who has no problem just leaving you sitting on your fat lying ass waiting on a bench wondering when you can eat and meet this poor unsuspecting piece of man meat.

oh and you cant eat man meat.
its illegal.

Ps. this post applies to the skinny ugly girls too.

So it looks like Shia wasn’t at fault in the accident. Some stupid ass ran a red light and railed into his truck. Whats more interesting is he was with his co star Isabel Lucas who is supposedly dating Adrian Grenier… hmm now if I was out at 3 am drunk with a hot babe im pretty sure id be on my way home with her to knock one out….

Detectives have determined that the other driver in Shia’s bust-up Sunday morning ran a red light, and that person is responsible for the crash, not LaBeouf. “He was not at fault,” says L.A. Sheriff’s spokesman Steve Whitmore.

Shia was arrested on misdemeanor DUI charges; his hand — and his truck — were badly busted in the crash

Can someone please tell these guys wearing Affliction and Tap Out how lame they look. Its not everyone that wears it but their is this group of guys that swear because they wear it and there buff that girls are just going to fall into their Muscle arms and and fuck the shit out of them simply based on the fact that the look like they could be in UFC. Im just dying to see one of them get fucked up in a fight, it would be soooo funny. hopefully one day soon. just a few more months untill i finish my UFC training.

ROFL.

get a clue guys, you look retarded.

Shia LaBeouf was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving Sunday after an early morning wreck in which the “Indiana Jones” star injured his hand and knee, authorities said.

Labeouf is currently undergoing surgery for a badly injured left hand.

Shia faces misdemeanor DUI charges after he allegedly made an unsuccessful left turn in front of another car. Shia’s truck rolled and he sustained an injury to his left hand that required him to have surgery. A female riding with him and the male driver of the other car sustained minor injuries.

Another Hollywood celeb who needed more attention…what a fuck head!

Joe Francis, founder of the infamous “Girls Gone Wild” empire, was arraigned Monday on federal tax-fraud charges. The case, which arose last year in Reno, NV, was transferred to Los Angeles, CA, in May.

 In addition to charges he claimed more than $20 million in bogus deductions on his 2002 and 2003 corporate tax returns, Francis also is accused of illegally transferring $15 million from an offshore bank account to a California brokerage firm.

Among the allegedly irregular tax deductions for which Francis is under scrutiny are $3.78 million that was claimed as a business expense but instead allegedly was used to build a home in Mexico, $10.4 million in allegedly phony consulting services and a $500,000 allegedly bogus insurance claim.

If convicted, Francis faces as many as 10 years in federal prison and $500,000 in fines.

Francis was indicted in April 2007 after the former accountant for his company Mantra Films allegedly requested a multimillion dollar federal reward for ratting out Francis’ allegedly dodgy tax accounting.

According to a statement from his attorneys, the case will reveal that the truth is “about an accountant who thinks he should be rewarded for his own mistakes, mistakes that will cost Joe millions of dollars.

The IRS says the accountant should get millions and Joe prison for mistakes the accountant made and never told Joe he made. That’s outrageous.”

Francis, a graduate of the University of Southern California who plied amateur videos of drunken, topless college girls into a multimillion-dollar empire, is no stranger to tax-evasion charges. He recently served 11 months in jail on unrelated tax charges.

He has had other legal problems, as well. In 2006 he was sentenced to probation in Florida after pleading no contest to violating 18 USC 2257, the federal adult-entertainment records-keeping and labeling law. In March, he pleaded no contest to child abuse and prostitution charges stemming from the appearance of allegedly underage girls in some of his videos.

 In the civil sphere, Ashley Dupre, the high-dollar New York call girl linked to former Gov. Eliot Spitzer, accused Francis of filming her when she was only 17 and subsequently threatened to sue him. That led to another suit against Francis: After Francis released a video of Dupre posing for his camera while holding a driver’s license bearing the name Amber Arpaio, the real Amber Arpaio filed suit against both Dupre and Francis for allowing her lost driver’s license to be used in producing an adult video.

Dark Knight” star Christian Bale has denied allegations by his mother that he assaulted them, and he is cooperating with police, Bale’s publicists said Tuesday.

Long story short his Mom is a bitch, wants some fucking money and made up a whole stupid ass bullshit stunt to try to cash in. The history with Bale’s mom is that his mother and father divorced in 1992 and his mother made him choose, me or your father… Basically Bale picked his father and moved to la with im where his father became his manager. From that point it was basically bad blood between them and just recently Bale was kind enough to let his mother and sister come by to his hotel suite to visit. I guess thats where he went wrong unfortunately… Who knows what really went down but from what we hear it was just some random drama and then mommy trying to come into some cash by creating a fuss over nothing. Bale was man enough to turn himself in to police to help with the investigation, he has not been charged with any crime and was released a few hours later. Lets hope thet batman can keep up with the crime fighting and not the mommy drama. Who’s ready for the next batman movie? I know I can’t fucking wait!

To the bat cave……

Did you get that new iPhone yet? Well i sure hope not. Turns out there is a really good reason why the new iphone is out so soon. Apple didnt want you to learn that you could hack your old iPhone and run it better then the new one. The new iphone out with new firmware cant be hacked as of yet. pretty much if apple didnt release this newer phone it was only a matter of time before everyone just started hacking there iphone to make it fully customizable. you can customize your background, desk top add free ring tones, any sounds you want, any rings you want………and best of all any applications you want.

check it sluts

But then again you might be better off going out and buying your own brand fucking new iphone.
“But i thought you just said you could hack the old model to make it better?”
Yeah you can but not to many people are that fucking smart. i mean they’ve made it pretty fucking easy but if your one of those dumb asses that cant follow directions then your gonna be fucked.

i happen to be pretty computer savoy, be prepared to install some software and mnot how to create folders…….. maybe even some really hard copy and pasting.

well good luck. if you cant figure it out youtube it or google it like you should have when you first got the phone. Enjoy!

peace bitches.

HIPSTER……

What a gay ass fucking name to give ones own group of people. Hipsters are the reason I hate Long Beach. You might be asking yourself what is a Hipster? They were the original scene kids, but as soon as the Fucking “New Jacks”, ie, new to the scene, came along they changed the style up to something they couldn’t understand. They think fashion means dressing up like your poor and exploiting their newly found ability to grow facial hair
Well A hipster is one of these lost scene kids that got so caught up in thinking they were so fucking Radical that they evolved into these self Righteous Fuck heads that swore they were the coolest shit ever. There that lame ass version of cool though, they try to be that “hey Im cool because i dont follow the crowed.” The Only way to be cool off of a style is to start it yourself. if your the one and only, or at least the one to start it they your at least original, anyone else is just a follower.

Anyways these are the kids that shop and vintage clothing stores, dont get me wrong ive bought some vintage clothing before……….. but these guys……. fucking ey, thats the only store they know of. there whole fucking wardrobe is “HIP”.

They have pretty much clammed Long Beach for themselves, riding around on their bikes everywhere, eating their vegan food and their Pink Berry yogurt.
They think there Cultured because Long Beach is SOOOOOOO fucking diverse, No shit? Can someone tell one of these fucking idiots what country we live in?

The U.S. of fucking A.

I dont have to be in L.B. to experience culture, the whole country is cultured.
anyways, i dont know, maybe its just because all these idiots look like there late for a fucking Amy Whinehouse Video Shoot. Lord knows i cant stand that idiot.

Look, your girls are ugly, the gays, oh um sorry I mean guys, are the biggest bunch of assholes ever. Can you blame me for having to rant on this subject. I could go on on how this whole Hipster Craze is just a rip off off the 80’s “Mod” scene but these morons are far too young and UN-hip to know what the fuck that was. />

I cant wait for this Fad to end.

Guys if your going to invite a bunch of guys to your “SWEET ASS KEG PARTY!” , Do your buddies a favor and try to invite some Girls for fucks sake, sure i know thats not everyones cup of tea but for us strait guys, girls at a party is a must.

Now what really pisses me off is when some Fucking lame ass gets turned down and decides to Cock Block. For instance if you have to cry in a corner all night to get some girls attention, that would be considered a cock block. How so? Well one, as a man, you should never cry, and you should definetly never cry in front of a girl. Right? Right. Now that thats settled, if you cry for attention, or mope around like a little bitch while your buddies are trying to party heres what happens, one girl gos to comfort you, then another, then another and then before you know it everyone is lining up to take a big bite out of your pussy sandwich.
Meanwhile your buddies are no doubt rather upset that you seriously just had to pull out the bitch card. now all the fucking girls are all Emo, the party dies and before you know it your stuck awake at 4am drunk and everyone is asleep. The way i see it if your gonna mope around and cry you should just stay at home and not ruin the night for everyone else.

GROW SOME FUCKING HUEVOS HOMBRE!

Great Movie.

It really sucks to see such a bad ass fighter and such a cool guy get fucked up in the head out of no where. I’ve had the honor of meeting rampage and hanging out with him several times and to hear about what went down was truly a surprise and totally out of character for him. In his mug shot it’s like a totally different person and I really hope w/e the hell happened he can get over it quick and get back up on his feet to kick some ass in the UFC. Thats as long as they don’t toss his ass in the slammer or looney bin from that insane stunt he pulled this week.

Lets just all hope his ass doesn’t fall into a slump from which he never returns.

So is it only me or does anyone else get annoyed as hell when some random jerk ass pulls up next to you at a red light with their shitty ass music so freaking loud it’s like 2 decimals from blowing your ear drums out…? Well im not going to rant on this one long but for fuck sakes, SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY! Nobody wants to hear your stupid ass car blasting music that you think is cool, especially if its some whacked out hip hop bullshit or some early 80’s rock band crap…. Trust me, when people look at you and smile or nod their heads, it’s because they think YOU’RE A FAG! Bottom line, if you want to blast ur shit then power to you but use your fucking windows dumb ass….

Former UFC lightweight champ, Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, was busted Tuesday afternoon after cops chases his ass down from a reported hit and run. Rampage eventually got to the exclusive Balboa Peninsula in Newport Beach, where he again drove on the sidewalk, “causing pedestrians to flee in terror.” Apparently having fame and fortune wasn’t good enough so he had to bust out some Britney Spears antics and go fucking nuts….It’s a shame because who knows how long it will be before rampage can come back to the Octagon now!

Dont you just hate it when you find a cool band all by yourself and then you show a few people and then by the next week that band is everywhere and gets played out before it even got started.
It just sucks so bad because the music I hear everyday is just complete utter shit.

How the fuck do you write a song with lyrics like, ey bay bay.
What the fuck i can do better then that.
heres a New song I wrote.
Its called No Talent.

here are the lyrics…..
No Talent ass Hack, all my rhymes are wack, Kids cut me some slack, as i take your cash to wipe my ass, no talent. no talent, no talent.

There now drop in a beat, repeat the lyrics and fucking pay my ass….

Oh and ill be back in a month with the fucking lame ass remix…. which is pretty much just my same lyrics to someone elses instramentals. now pay me again……

This is Gayness. Not much i can do about that accept complain.

Here are some bands i like before they got really really gay.

MGMT.
NFG.
Coldplay.
Bad Religion.
Copeland.
Fallout Boy.
Butthole surfers.
Bloodhound gang.
Weezer.
Beck.
Blink 182.

And nothing kills good music for me better then “KIDS BOP”

I dont want to hear little kids fucking up good songs or making shitty songs sound worse.

Thats the only good thing i can say about one hit wonders.
At least people dont have time to play that shit out.

Has anyone else noticed lately how the radio just plays complete and utter bullshit? I’ve never been a big fan of radio music anyways but on the ocasion that I do take the time to turn that little nob in my pinto I expect to hear some half descent shit on at least one station out there but noooooo….I hear the most pathetic bullshit ever played lately and we are calling this music? Im honestly starting to believe that the these producing companies that are whipping out the new artist are just fucking with us, they are like hey lets see which rapper can come out with the most fucking idiotic lyrics ever and make it a number 1 hit. Maybe it’s a game to them to see how stupid we all really are? For example…who the fuck makes a song about riding a bike with no handlebars…seriously bike, handlebars…wow thats fucking creative! I think my 90 year old grandma has more talent in her dentures than half the rappers out there but then again what the fuck do I know right.

Anyways when it gets to the point where “artists” start rapping about how they can say anything and sell a million records then you know its time to move on. Fuck it i’m going back to the oldies…..

And don’t get me wrong, theres plenty of talented artist out there but someone needs to shut the fucking radio retards up with the bullcrap they are playing these days. And please someone kick Ryan Seacrest in the nuts so just maybe he will shut up for one day out of the year.

Grandmas boy OUT!

Ahhhh Amy Winehouse. I heard your rehab song once, and it sucked, I might have cut you some slack if you actually made good music, or if you were better looking, or if you didn’t have a habit of annoying the shit outta me.

Honestly after that rehab song I never heard another song by Amy Winehouse, Probally because it was the gayest song ever. To me it sounded like Christina Aguilera Had a Drug problem. I honestly thought it was Christina trying to start a new bad girl image or something.

Anyways back to shithouse. I never heard another song by her, it was like she just started getting in all kinds of stupid trouble to stay in the media spotlight.

It really has me stumped.
Its like……

WHAT THE FUCK WORLD??

Ive seen bums that are better looking this this chick, Probably more talented and as far as the singing goes…..
I’m sure most artists use all the same sound equipment that i’ve used. Its pretty neat how a couple thousands dollars worth of recording equipment can make you sound like fucking Frank Sinatra.

Hey look what i found

See here in this picture shes almost doable. What the hell happened. I would feel a lot better having to listen to one of her shitty songs on the radio, knowing that she was at least hot. I dont even wanna write about her to much, she might be getting off to this bad publicity.

Ehh but i’m sure shell just scratch those crabs and move on to another day of being a walking shithouse.

Hey its Amy’s gap, She can fit a little Pee Pee in there, Maybe even a Crack pipe!! I dont know weither to smile at her or to Kick a field goal. She really lucked out.

High Five Shithouse!!!

How are these assholes famous? These are the kids that would get the shit beat out of them in my school. Its not that there those hip social outcasts either. You gotta be one of a kind for that shit, otherwise its just another trend.

I think America loves Amy because they love to hate Amy.
I know i wouldn’t wanna be famous for Being the ugly girl with jacked up teeth, that tries to sing while hitting a crack pipe and scratching her crabs.

so Amy Darling….. take my advice.

And read the headline.